First of all, what I don't know about music could fill a phone book.
I listened to the first 2 parts and I wasn't quite sure where you were going with this. Sounded like you were in the ball park, but still had a ways to go, then all of a sudden the tempo picked up at the 1:07 mark and it sounded great, then you stopped and you picked up again at the 1:27 it picked up again and I said Yes!!!!!.....it was awesome. Then the chorus part sounded real good. Once you connect all the dots, I think you'll really have something.
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