I'm not sure about these two lines:
- "I forget the times when I remained,". For me in the original French, she means "I forget the time I have left"
- "What that adds up to,". "Ce qui compte" means "what has an importance", maybe also "what counts", word for word?
But maybe you just used English expressions that I don't know and that are a correct translation...
You got this one wrong though:
"They have to drown themselves, melt themselves,"
"S'il faut se noyer, se fondre"
I know the verb "falloir" must be a pain for foreigners since you have no equivalent, and it conjugates only with "il" ("it"). You can say "il faut que", never "je faux que", or "tu faux que", etc... It means that the subject following "que" must/has to/would rather do what follows.
"
Il faut que je parte travailler" : "
I have to go to work"
It's more general and contextual when it's followed by an infinitive verb, like in this song. But you still can vary like you want in English. Here, you could translate:
"If you(or I) have to drown your(my)self, melt your(my)self,
.......
I would rather pay the price"
Hint, I think that you can often understand "il faut que" like "it's needed that" or "it's required that"
EDIT: "falloir" at Wiktionnaire:
http://fr.wiktionary.org/wiki/falloir