[Cooney]

Originally Posted by mbehna

I would like to say that regarding #5 speeches is more accurate than times. As for #4 electromagnet is technically correct but can also be "read" as electric-loving - "electromagnetic love" is pushing a little.

Aye, both of those are bows to American comprehension, at the expense of literal accuracy. The use of "times" instead of "speeches" is totally inaccurate as far as the word itself goes. "Not more than six speeches" however makes no sense whatsoever in English, and isn't even a grammatically correct sentence. For that reason, I tried to change it to something that would capture the same idea, rather than the precise word.

I'll plead guilty as charged on the electromagnetic love bit. That is one of the lines in the song that defies translation for both its possible meaning. Because the French word can mean both things without change, it gets a double entendre we lose in English. If I made it just "electro-love" we love the magnet reference (important, because of the champs-magnetique lines later), and if I made it just "electromagnet" we lose the play that allows it to be people in love. I ended up just writing out both meanings, and sticking them together. Though it still loses the specific "magnet" reference, I think the closest I could get in English would be to call it the school of "electro-attraction," which seemed kind of clunky.

Also in the original french
On se statique
Quand je lui dis non,

But I would say a more meaningful translation is
We don't hear each other
When I tell him 'no'

where 'statique' is a verb form of 'making static noise'.

Ah, very good! I wasn't familiar with the verb form of statique (Statiquer?), and was a bit curious about the reflexive on it. I'd ended up with "we turn ourselves to static" rather than "we make static (noise) between eachother." That definitely adds something to the understanding there, and shifts the meaning of what I'd put afterwords. The challenge now is for me to figure out how to imply the inability to hear, without losing the "static" reference that is important to the song's electrical metaphor.

Anyways, I just wanted to clarify a few items and hopefully add to a better understanding of the lyrics.

Very much obliged! I hope to have another set of three songs done soon, ready for comment by anybody who's so inclined.

Oh, and welcome to the boards!