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Old 12-16-2009, 06:06 PM
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Default Why i will never have a girlfriend

This put a smile on my face. Sick of being single? Waiting for the right girl? Just GIVE UP! Because heres why!

http://en.nothingisreal.com/wiki/Why...e_a_Girlfriend
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Old 12-16-2009, 06:19 PM
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Old 12-16-2009, 06:19 PM
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Excellent Puffy!

I knew there had to be a good reason for my all years of cruel rejection?
But don't give up just yet...wait until you are my age....then there really is no hope whatsoever.
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Old 12-16-2009, 08:39 PM
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I don't need girlfriends, just ejection pods, and there's a lot i've been in contact with.

Life's good.
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Old 12-16-2009, 09:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheBarrett View Post
I don't need girlfriends, just ejection pods, and there's a lot i've been in contact with.

Life's good.
LOLZ! My first glance, I read "I don't need girlfriends, just erection pods"
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Old 12-16-2009, 10:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wasabi622 View Post
LOLZ! My first glance, I read "I don't need girlfriends, just erection pods"
I read "ejaculation" pods. LOL
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Old 12-16-2009, 10:08 PM
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Both are correct in their own way.
Oh har har, I am such a chauvinist.
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Old 12-19-2009, 01:04 PM
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Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:


You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!


So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:


Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs


She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:


Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids..


'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'


So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:


Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.


'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.


She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:


Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.


'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'


Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:


Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.


She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:


Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.


PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.


The first floor has wives that love sex.


The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.


The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
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Old 12-19-2009, 02:55 PM
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It's cheaper in the long run to hire escorts and not have a steady girlfriend or wife. Tiger should have listened to his club instead of his heart.
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Old 12-19-2009, 06:04 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ALS View Post
Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:


You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!


So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:


Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs


She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:


Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids..


'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'


So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:


Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.


'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.


She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:


Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.


'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'


Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:


Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.


She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:


Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.


PLEASE NOTE:

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.


The first floor has wives that love sex.


The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.


The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.
HAHAHAHAA! That was excellent! "Proves that woman are impossible to please" lolz
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