Ask Azhiri and Karla!

[BlackAnthem]

And what if I open up and she doesn't like me back? If she doesn't love me back then I want to stay friends but it might be awkward. But I'm willing to gamble. We don't talk everyday but when we do I will. Thanks Karla. I'll let you know how it goes. Wish me luck.

[user472884]

Oh hey, BlackAnthem! I didn't notice you were in the boat as well? How've you been? Is your oar as splintery as mine?

[HelixSix]

Originally Posted by BlackAnthem

Now don't get me wrong, I am happy she's happy with this other guy...but I'm always going to love her, forever. Nothing will ever change that. I want her to know I'd do anything for her. I would move to Georgia for her. I would do anything. I think about her all the time.

This is a very common situation. You are the super nice guy and she see's you much more as a great friend than a potential lover. I mean if you are nice to her all the time of course she's gonna say you are better than her real friends. Honestly, nice guy's come across as weak un-challenging pussies to a lot of girls. She knows she could get you any time she wanted and make you lay down in traffic for her. That's not what she wants, especially now. It is only clarified by the jerks she goes out with now and the crowd she is around. She does not want a guy that will cater to her every whim or make boring sweet love to her. She wants excitement and her hormones are basically in charge.

I quoted your above text because you just cannot let her know about that stuff. At least not right now. After she goes through a string of crap relationships she will begin to appreciate niceness more. You also have to consider the timing of all this. You being in college with her still in high school is not a good situation. It's two different worlds even if you live in the same city.

Think about how much pressure you are putting on her. I mean at this point you'd probably marry her. If I knew a girl felt like that about me and I didn't feel the same I'd run for the hills, but trying to do it in the nicest way possible.

My opinion is you might be on the path of destroying something that has potential. Don't smother or put pressure on her. She knows who you are and will come to you when the time is right for her. I'm speaking out of experience here. I've ruined it before and seen so many guys do the same thing.

[BlackAnthem]

Originally Posted by Jalen

Oh hey, BlackAnthem! I didn't notice you were in the boat as well? How've you been? Is your oar as splintery as mine?

I've okay besides this. Haha!

Originally Posted by HelixSix

This is a very common situation. You are the super nice guy and she see's you much more as a great friend than a potential lover. I mean if you are nice to her all the time of course she's gonna say you are better than her real friends. Honestly, nice guy's come across as weak un-challenging pussies to a lot of girls. She knows she could get you any time she wanted and make you lay down in traffic for her. That's not what she wants, especially now. It is only clarified by the jerks she goes out with now and the crowd she is around. She does not want a guy that will cater to her every whim or make boring sweet love to her. She wants excitement and her hormones are basically in charge.

I quoted your above text because you just cannot let her know about that stuff. At least not right now. After she goes through a string of crap relationships she will begin to appreciate niceness more. You also have to consider the timing of all this. You being in college with her still in high school is not a good situation. It's two different worlds even if you live in the same city.

Think about how much pressure you are putting on her. I mean at this point you'd probably marry her. If I knew a girl felt like that about me and I didn't feel the same I'd run for the hills, but trying to do it in the nicest way possible.

My opinion is you might be on the path of destroying something that has potential. Don't smother or put pressure on her. She knows who you are and will come to you when the time is right for her. I'm speaking out of experience here. I've ruined it before and seen so many guys do the same thing.

I totally understand where you're coming from. I haven't talked to her yet. I just want her to know. You're right I'd marry her.

Oh, jeez. I don't want to pressure her...

So how do I tell her I love her, without telling her? In other words, what actions do I take that say "I love you" but at the same time "No pressure."

The distance will never work. And going to college will open up new possibilities for me. I think more than anything I want to always be there for her. I want to have that relationship we had when we were kids. I want her to be my best friend. Only then will I have a shot at love with her.

But if I walk away now, I am a friend. If I wait and be there whenever she needs me, I can be a best friend. And if I spill my heart to her on a page, I will be either nothing or the world to her.

God I love her.

[VVVACCPLPNLY]

All I got's to say is that there are many things I recognize in this situation. Just do what feels right to you, dude. If you do what someone else tells you, then she loves it, she's loving what you've become. I live by many rules, and one is thus:
'I'd rather be loathed for who I am, than loved for who I'm not.'
If you do something, and she doesn't like you for it, most likely she won't like you, and thus it wouldn't have worked out anyways. But if you do something and she does love you, and was really what felt right for you to do, then there you go! Just don't change just to make her happy, because then you'll be miserable.

[BlackAnthem]

Everything said here this week are valid points. The distance, the college, the pressure, opening up to her. Anyway, I want to thank you all. You really helped me out a lot. I'm sure if it's meant to be it will work out. In the meantime, all I can do is be there for her and be happy I'm her friend.

So THANK YOU ALL:



Especially HelixSix, Karla, and VVVACCPLPNLY. You all rock.

[VVVACCPLPNLY]

No thanks needed buddy. After all, I really shouldn't be answering questions in this thread anyways...

[Karlalizee]

*glances around* Well Azhiri, it looks like our work here is done.

[user472884]

well, I just spent the last 7 minutes trying to think of somewhat legitimate questions to ask about the realm of women (at least ones that could be answered), but I really can't think of any.

So yes, good show, ladies! Well done!

[Människöpesten]

I got a question. Y U SO AWESOME