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#41
05-13-2007, 05:08 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
 
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#42
05-13-2007, 05:40 PM
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One of my all-time favorits: John Cleese as the hotel owner Basil Fawlty in the classic comedy series Fawlty Towers.
In this episode he has German guests and he intends not to mention the war <object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5MbeT7_ARm8"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5MbeT7_ARm8" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>
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#44
05-13-2007, 09:45 PM
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A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is
foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. "I have just the thing," says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. "Just place this between your cheek and gum." The client places the ball in his mouth and the barber proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes the client asks in garbled speech. "And what if I swallow it?" "No problem," says the barber. "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does."
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* Mr.atra201's myspace ****************************  **************************** "Such a shame to believe in escape A life on every face And that's a change, till I'm finally left with an eight Tell me to react, I just stare Maybe I don't know if I should change A feeling that we share... It's a shame (Such a shame) Number me with rage, it's a shame (Such a shame) Number me in haste, it's a shame This eagerness to change It's a shame..."
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#45
05-14-2007, 07:14 PM
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Quote:
Jokes aside, WWII was terrible. All the people that died at the war...rest in peace.
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Feeling closer than ever  ¡Viva Alizee! P.S.- Thanks for making a difference 
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#47
07-28-2007, 12:24 PM
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An American dignitary was visiting a village in a poor African nation. Not certain of his welcome, he made a speech full of glowing terms to the natives gathered there.......
"I bring you warm greetings from the people of the United States!" he declared, which was duly translated by the interpreter. "Kazanga!" cried the natives. "We wish this beautiful country peace and prosperity!" he continued. "Kazanga!" yelled the natives, even louder. "We hope this will be the beginning of many years of mutual friendship and economic benefit to both nations!" he went on. "Kazanga! Kazanga!" roared the natives. Later, as the dignitary was being escorted around the village by the chief, he commented, "That seemed to go well. They really do like us Americans, don't they?" "Uh, watch where you walk," said the chief; "don't step in the kazanga." 
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Last edited by Jess; 07-28-2007 at 03:55 PM..
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#49
07-29-2007, 07:18 AM
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Girl: "Forgive me father for I have sinned."
Priest: "What have you done my child?" Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch." Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?" Girl: "Because he touched my hand." Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand) Girl: "Yes father." Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch." Girl: "Then he touched my breast." Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast) Girl: "Yes father." Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch." Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, father." Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes) Girl: "Yes father." Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch." Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where." Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where) Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!" Priest: (after a few minutes): "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch." Girl: "But father he had AIDS!" Priest: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!" Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, he says, "Honey, my hands are freezing!" She says, "Well put them here between my legs and that will warm them up." After lunch he goes back out to chop some more wood and comes back and says gain "Man! My hands are really freezing!" She says again, "Well put them here between my legs and warm them up." He does, and again that warms him up. After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop wood for the night. When he returns, he again says, "Honey, my hands are really freezing!" She looks at him and says, "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, DON'T YOUR EARS EVER GET COLD? What do you call a maori under a waterfall? Blackcurrent.
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 HI, i like giraffes.
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