Holy goddamn fucking mother fucker shit ginormous fuck

user472884 · #1 08-23-2010, 12:04 AM

So I was walking to my other room, past my family chilling out in the basement living room watching tv, when I spot a little grey thing on the floor at the foot of one of the couches.

What was it? was it a hair scrunchie thing? was it trash?

No, no not that wretched form...

But that's ridiculously gigantic... that must be a toy or something... it must be...

but wait, I haven't seen any of our toy spiders in years... and even if we still have them, they would be three stories above me...

OH FUCK!

*flicks lights on*
*screams like girl*

And this thing is fast, so fast that when my dad was trying to catch it it had moved a good two feet before we had even realized it had moved.

This hell-demon is so big, it wouldn't even fit in the other thread, it needed it's own

52mm diameter lens cap

Marquis<3Alizée · #2 08-23-2010, 12:22 AM

Holy ape shit, that damn thing looks like it was sent from the depths of hell!!!!! AHHHH fucking gives me the creeps!

user472884 · #3 08-23-2010, 12:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marquis<3Alizée

Holy ape shit, that damn thing looks like it was sent from the depths of hell!!!!! AHHHH fucking gives me the creeps!

exactly. I don't have any anti-hell paraphernalia readily handy, so in addition to having about six layers of gorilla duct tape and 4 layers of masking tape, I put it in the middle of my bathtub (in my other room, across the house) in about three inches of water. One can never be too careful, especially with a Chuckus Norrisiea

MarkL · #4 08-23-2010, 01:11 AM

Looks like a wolf spider.

edgar93 · #5 08-23-2010, 01:17 AM

hum... you should let it bite you. Maybe you'll wake up next morning with sum of spiderman's superpowers in you

Junkmale · #6 08-23-2010, 01:26 AM

So my Birthday present has arrived then.........

user472884 · #7 08-23-2010, 01:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by edgar93

hum... you should let it bite you. Maybe you'll wake up next morning with sum of spiderman's superpowers in you

or wake up in excruciating pain with a black and blue arm that's swollen to three times it's normal size and leaking odd yellow fluids

MarkL · #8 08-23-2010, 01:35 AM

or this will happen
http://thecontaminated.com/spider-bite-problem/

WARNING: Not for those who do not like gross things. DO NOT VIEW WHILE EATING PLEASE

AceTone · #9 08-23-2010, 01:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jalen

or wake up in excruciating pain with a black and blue arm that's swollen to three times it's normal size and leaking odd yellow fluids

So Hulk, then.

You did poke holes, right?

Azhiri · #10 08-23-2010, 01:38 AM

HOLY HELL IT'S HUGE
OH MY GOD IT HAS FUR
WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN

kill it with fire. And then scoop up the ashes and burn those ashes, then since that probably won't do anything and it's a silly idea put those ashes in a jar, then freeze that jar, then send the frozen jar with the ashes in it to the exact location of the other side of the world from where your house is.