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Old 05-18-2012, 11:36 PM
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FanDeAliFee FanDeAliFee is offline
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Default Clandestine unsigned visual artwork by Alizée on the Internet

Tiny Ajaccio remains the proud home of <a href="http://www.musee-fesch.com/"><i>Musée Palais Fesch</i></a>, which boasts the finest collection of Italian primitive art in all France after the Louvre. Just imagine what an inspiration such a rare treasure was to Alizée and her family in the days before cheap, high-resolution digital cameras and displays, cheap digital storage and broadband communication media were widely available!

As you may know, from her earliest years, Alizée was into the visual arts, with her colorful design for an <i>Air Outremer</i> airplane winning a 1995 art competition entered by very many thousands.

<i>Obviously, even as an eleven-year-old girl, Alizée lacked the slightest pteromerhanophobia</i>, recently commented famed feminist author Erica Jong, creator of heroine Isadora Wing. (Google it, Einstein!)

<table width="600" align="center"><tr><td><img src="http://a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/11/6462d91580af4e86a28ff83fd465cbe2/l.jpg"> Alizée's winning design. Note the outer-space theme, which anticipates her enduring fascination with the cosmos, including ElecTro (ExtraTerrestrial "soul-music") band <i>Chateau Marmont</i>, composers of <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=teO2oLFLqo4"><i>Solar Apex</i></a>, and Alizée's recent acquisition of a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sailor_Moon"><i>Sailor Moon</i></a> tattoo. Mai oui, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4D8rxB16GVU"><i>Clara veut la lune</i></a>! (But all you Debussy fan-boys knew that all along.)</td></tr></table>

Now, if you cheap bastards had bought more of Alizée's stuff while her signature store was in business, we could have kept enjoying her thought-provoking designs openly. Alas, that was not to be. So instead, Alizée has undertaken clandestine decoration of the Internet with her original art work, all UNSIGNED.

Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to uncover examples of this art, and explain to the thicker members of Alizée America HOW you know the design is a GENUINE Alizée. Got it? Good.

The reason I am doing this right now is that Alizée's picture (below) is the Google Doodle of the day, the proud winner of the "Doodle 4 Google" contest! Yay!

<center><img src="http://www.google.com/logos/2012/d4g12-hp.jpg"></center>

It's pretty obvious that the original is a crayon work by Alizée. The first hints are the cluster of skull-like coconuts, which recall the design of Alizée's favorite scarf, and the maritime setting so dear to her, complete with the sail-denuded sailboat at left, an homage to her parents. Enormously compelling evidence is detailed below.

Thematically, the picture shows notre <i>Fée Clochette's</i> conception of what life was like for <i>Peter Pan</i>'s Captain Hook before the unfortunate loss of his hand. Here he is, blissfully enjoying a vacation on Corsica's pleasant beaches at Ajaccio, with BOTH of his hands intact. But take a CLOSER look. Does the face on Captain Hook look familiar? It damn well should! Alizée has cast HERSELF as the famous Captain, complete with classic-era 'zee hair, delicate nose, and the barest hint of Edie Sedgwick lipstick.

The key to most artwork is revealed field center. To highlight the poignant tragedy of losing his hand, Alizée shows the Captain proudly handling his enormous cock - a parrot of course, in keeping with pirate tradition. The sword to his other side in this ostensibly happy scene represents the latent menacing threat that something the Captain greatly values might one day be cut off: note the curious way it is pointed. (Perhaps it was Jeremy's mohel, a professional surgeon, who made the original suggestion? People who keep two sets of plates know what I mean.)

<table width="306" align="center"><tr><td><img src="http://distilleryimage7.instagram.com/0709c9bc9ea111e192e91231381b3d7a_6.jpg">
Coincidence? Alizée recently caught manhandling the shaft of an enormous Coke with her right hand. I wonder why her mouth is open so wide? Oh. (Note the skull; could it be a fugitive from a <i>Jolly Roger</i> flag?)</td></tr></table>
Those familiar with the <i>Peter Pan</i> story know that Peter himself would deprive the Captain of what he treasured so much more than the copious pirate booty we see ironically depicted here in the open chest, whacking off his hand during a struggle. How humiliating to be whacked off this way, and by a small Peter, no less. Surely the Captain would never forget such a hand job, hence his enduring enmity for the <i>Boy Who Would Never Get Up</i>, I mean <i>Grow Up</i>. Not exactly Eden; more like <nobr><i>Eden, Eden</i></nobr> - or even <nobr><i>Eden, Eden, Eden</i></nobr>. (Still remember how to Google, right? Good.)

Do please recall that the Captain's disjointed member was immediately fed to a female saltwater crocodile, who gobbled it down hungrily. As <i>Wikipedia</i> writes, <i>the crocodile also swallowed a clock, so Hook can tell from the ticking when she is near</i>. Of course, Alizée's picture makes it very clear that it could have been worse. Instead of the clock, the crock might have had the Captain's cock, leaving him without even a parrot for comfort. Still, it probably grieved him to know that the prominent tick this creature ever-after bore in her tummy, as a taunt to his manly pride, had once been his very own! (Assuming that "clock," "tick," and "crock" are not J. M. Barrie typos.)

Sadly, one can only guess at the title of Alizée's creation. How about:
<i>Prequel: Captain Hook pleasuring himself while he still could</i>

There is NO doubt that the artwork we have examined is a GENUINE Alizée. The only question is whether or not she created it when she was very much younger. But maybe that doesn't matter to someone who is <i>Forever Young</i>, like Peter Pan!

There's a rumor that someone wants to execute a <i>tableau vivant</i> which re-imagines this work. Combing the barbarous Internet, the only evidence for this allegation is what appears to be an audition snapshot, below-left. (Note the eyes shifted viewer-left, as in Alizée's picture.) But that young woman will have to get a parrot for herself - I'm pretty shy about lending mine out for photos. And to tell you the truth, it's not even very big.

<table align="center"><tr><td><img src="http://alizeeamerica.com/forums/picture.php?pictureid=1850&albumid=189&dl=13304557 39&thumb=1"></td><td><img src="http://www.google.com/logos/2012/d4g12-hp.jpg"></td></tr></table>

Ok, I've shown you mine. Now show me yours! What other CLANDESTINE UNSIGNED Alizée visual artwork can you find on the Internet AND plausibly authenticate?

Last edited by FanDeAliFee; 05-18-2012 at 11:49 PM..
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Old 09-02-2017, 01:20 PM
JPOB JPOB is offline
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Default Alizée "Doodle 4 Google"

In which you stated:

"The reason I am doing this right now is that Alizée's picture (below) is the Google Doodle of the day, the proud winner of the "Doodle 4 Google" contest! Yay!

<center><img src="http://www.google.com/logos/2012/d4g12-hp.jpg"></center>"

-----

That is indeed incorrect! The referenced image and winner can be found here:

google dot com/doodles/doodle-4-google-2012-us-by-dylan-hoffman

-----

Nice try...
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Old 09-02-2017, 03:00 PM
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Ray4AJ Ray4AJ is offline
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Welcome to AAm, JPOB!
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Old 09-02-2017, 03:24 PM
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Scruffydog777 Scruffydog777 is online now
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Welcome JPOB!
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